QUOTES/MOMENTS

QUOTES FROM WILL & GRACE

Honey, whats this, whats happening, whats going on here?

Grace, honey, weve talked about this outfit.

Honey, youre simple, youre shallow, and youre a common whore, thats why were soul mates! Karen

Kare, youre my best friend in the whole world! Jack

Grace, tell Will to redirect his anger at his mother where it belongs.

Martini, honey, and dont waste any space with those olives!

Hi, Poodle. Karen

Whos your daddy? Jack

You are. Karen

Oh, for Gods sake, its just the four of us. Grab a bottle, hunker down, and pray for daylight.

Oh, honey, well here, charge yourself a little happy.

Im sorry; you must have mistaken me for someone else. My name is Anastasia Beaverhousen.

Honey, whats going on, whats happening, whats this all about? Grace

Honey, whats this, what are you doing, whos that suppose to be? Karen

It feels like theres something missing in my life. You know, like my soul is on empty. -JACK

You can go alotta years on empty, honey. Trust me.

-KAREN

Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! This is a place of business! Were trying to get some work done in here and we dont need you just barginOkay, Im saying it and I dont even buy it. (starts laughing)

Smitty, whats it all about? Oh wait, I dont give a crap! (starts laughing)

Oh Im telling you, shes evil! Im being tortured in my own home; shes irresponsible, shes lazy, she drinks, and worst of all she makes fun of what I wear. What are you suppose to say to a woman like that?

Im Stanley Walkers bitch!

I quit -KAREN

Why because I saw you in one lousy movie? -GRACE

No, Grace, because the balance of power has shifted between us. You used to put me on a pedestal and look at me like I was some kind of a super woman; the epitome of everything thats good, and decent, and true. -KAREN

Um okay. -GRACE

But now when you look at me all youre going to see is the woman in that video...The bossy, domineering, heartbeat who uses her body to get what she wants

Lordy, Lordy, look at all the freaks.

Meats and cheeses, you are rockin my clock Mary!

I am trying to create a moment here! -KAREN

Right, so tell him... -GRACE

Im still talking. -KAREN

All im saying... -GRACE

Quit interrupting me! -KAREN

Dont yell at me! -GRACE

Im not yelling! -KAREN

YES YOU ARE!! (really loud) -GRACE

(very sad) God, honey, I was just trying to tell you a little story -KAREN

Oh my god, youre a big lez!

FROM EPISODE "HOMO FOR THE HOLIDAYS"

He also told her I was his girlfriend -GRACE

And she bought that??? -KAREN

(With her feelings hurt)

Why wasnt I your girlfriend, queerbait? -KAREN

What? -JACK

You told your mother that grace was your girlfriend! How could you? -KAREN

Karen I didnt even know you when I made up that lie. -JACK

Oh yeah? Well when you met me then you should have broken up with her and hooked up with me. -KAREN

Youre married, Im gay. -JACK

(mockingly) Not in the lie -KAREN

Okay, Im thankful that I found a pharmacologist who is dumb as a box of hairAnd my secret is, Jack and I were doing the dirty dirty while you two were still together! -KAREN

Karen, how come you moved in on her man? JACK'S MOM

No, no, no, no, no; he came onto me, he was looking for a real woman not someone who just lays there like bib lettuce, ha ha ha ha ha, bib lettuce. -KAREN

The truth is, after 2 weeks with her he come running back to me. -GRACE

He did not!! -KAREN

Oh, but he did. What were his exact words again? Oh, yes, my Hearld and Maude phase is over. -GRACE

Oh I have half a mind to throw this martini right in your face! (then starts drinking it) -KAREN

MEMORABLE MOMENTS

After taking a pregnancy test with Jack and finding out she isn't pregnant, Karen hides the fact that she is upset but Jack sees through it. Before he leaves he walks back to her and says "Karen, don't hate me for this but..." (gives her a hug) "I love you".

Karen finds out Stan has had a heart attack. While at the hospital Will, Grace, Jack, & Rosario make bets as to who Karen will turn to for her inevitable emotional breakdown. Yet when she finds out, she tricks them into doing things they would rather not do. Then, when she is alone, Karen breaks down into tears until Grace walks in...who Karen allowed to see her soft-side.

Jack and Karen are outside of the room where Grace is getting ready for her wedding and talking to Will. "Kare, can I kiss you?" "Why, honey?" "Just cause..." "Sure" (They give one another a little kiss) "Heehee" (Then Jack and Karen start making out, laying on a table knocking things off the wall)

After discovering Stan sleeping with another woman, Karen goes to see Jack at Café Jacques'. They make small talk and then Jack asks "So?" and Karen reveals Stan has been cheating on her for months with a woman who works in the prison cafeteria. After explaining this, she reveals to Jack that she left Stan when 2 small kids walk in to trick-or-treat. Karen pours BOURBON into the kids' pumpkin basket.

In the second episode, "A New Lease on Life", Jack meets Karen. Jack continuously compliments Karen which prompts her to flaunt her body.

JACK: P.S., loving the boobs! Perky, with all kinds of attitude. Store-bought?

KAREN: Uh-uh.

JACK: Right on! God, I had no idea you would be so...kitten with a whip! Come on, let's touch stomachs! [JACK PULLS UP HIS SHIRT.]

KAREN: Oh, my lord, you are a complete freak! [KAREN LIFTS UP HER SHIRT AND HER AND JACK TOUCH STOMACHS.]

Grace and Karen have a heart-to-heart talk when they both get drunk. The two end up wearing each others clothes, drinking, and talking about their love-lives and their first time. Later, Will and Jack walk in to find Karen lying on top of Grace on the couch.

Grace can't seem to figure out why Karen keeps lying to her about her nephew. She assumes Karen doesn't think she is good enough to date him yet when she goes to the opera that night and talks to Karen, Karen reveals that she thinks Grace is special, and that her nephew isn't good enough for Grace.

In the episode "An Old-Fashioned Piano Party" Jack writes a novel while he is in pain after breaking up with his 2-day boyfriend which turns Karen on. Soon after, Jack gets back together with his latest interest which prompts Karen to pay him to dump Jack since he is no longer in pain (which means he can't write any further on his novel). Jack finds out and tells Karen he could never forgive her for this, it has caused him so much pain. Yet when Karen whips out the money, Jack explains that he has no choice but to write through that pain.